As I Say My Goodbyes

Saturday, January 30, 2010

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You make it hurt.

Gah. Everything has been really getting under my skin. Wtf, everything and I mean everything is irritating me. Bitch's PM just totally pissed me off. 5 words and... Kaboom. Another one, I was thinking "wtf you learn that NOW?'.

WHAT'S MY FUCKING PROBLEM. Ugh.

I GIVE UP ON LIFE, DAMN IT.

I'm hanging by a thread|10:56 PM|

Thursday, January 28, 2010

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My heart aches when it's not supposed to.

Mine, bitch, fuck off.

And I have to keep it all inside, cos in this new age we're all judged not only by appearance, but even how we feel.

And people wonder why people can't be themselves. Ask yourself, are you yourself all the time? It's a definite 'no'. If I'm wrong, shoot me.

I'm hanging by a thread|11:46 PM|

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I absolutely love her

Dudes... Hi. Well, today was rather interesting.

Happy 17th birthday to Jake, of course. *draws big heart*

As if she reads this anyway?

The morning started with HHF. Oh, man. We had a "circuit" to follow, and this year we've got "leaders". For 5N, we got Cassandra Nicholas. =) She's really funny and understanding.

Well, after about 3 rounds, my chest started to hurt. =( I was tired in less than half a minute, but that's a different story! Haha! So my chest was hurting real bad. Real real bad. It was a sort of sharp pain... Interesting, hard to explain. As I've said earlier, I'm worried about these chest pains. Awww man. I hope it's not one of those long term things that are incredibly troublesome. I'd rather get a heart attack and die. Suffer so long for what.

School was as usual. Nothing much. English was four blocks, I enjoy my time in English. =)))) Cos I don't have to do what other people wanna do cos no one else is free except for me, and Faith whom I don't talk to much (at all). She's nice, we're just not all pally pally.

After English, many of us went straight to the Art studio. Somehow, everyone has this mentalitly: Clock 2 hours and leave! (zhao)

I stayed until my mum arrived. We had a mani-pedi appointment... Haha. So unlike me. But it's for CNY and my mum wanted it. I love my mum, so I did it for her. Not like I hate it either, felt good.

Went with my grandmother too, the neo neo neopets one.

The saloon was fantastic.

1. Had a toilet. Very good!

2. Fully air conditioned without a bustling outside world cos they were on the third floor of y'know those places where you climb up the stairs after going through one door... along the road kind?......

3. Free movies.

4. Massage chairs!

5. Free cream, hahaha.

6. Complimentary drinks.

7. My grandmother and one of the beauticians were complementary. (hahaha alike words)

8. They exfoliated our arms and legs too! Not just the nails.

9. Used the weird hard scrub thing for our feet. Ooh, ticklish!

10. Calm ambience.

That's ten good points about that place. I've more. =)

SO, the mani-pedi was great. My toes look good now. =D And my fingernails were buffed and all.

Stupid Geog project. =(

I'm hanging by a thread|11:12 PM|

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

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Poise and rationality

Why do I wait around for things that aren't ever going to happen? Sigh. Oh wellz.

I think I've been really worrisome lately... And pretty annoying. I don't know why, I've been so... easily ticked these days. =( Sorry Elites. Not like they read this anyway. I need more supportive friends. =( HAHA. Shut up Shannen.

I'm so worried!!!

I'm worried about Art. I'm worried about Bio. I'm worried about my eyes. I'm worried about my teeth. I'm worried about my skin! I'm worried about my fats. I'm worried about my growth. I'm worried about my fucking farm in Farmville. I'm worried about my friendships. I'm worried about my chest pains. I'm worried about my heart palpitations. I'm worried about my stud. I'm worried about my toes.

I'm full of worry aren't I? What a pleasure. -.-

I'm hanging by a thread|12:11 AM|

Monday, January 25, 2010

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Did you know that when it snows

My eyes become large and the light that you shine can be seen

Hello people. (Namely my stalker haha)

This is gonna be a long post which will be dynamic because I've realised the font is small and almost blends with the black, makin' it hard to read. (;

Played for morning assembly. Loved Crystal's "talk" with _. HAHA. Some people don't change until someone tells them they need to.

Bio was funny. Brenda was practically drooling over our Bio teacher's engagement ring. Lol. Like she's never seen a diamond in her life or something! The eye is so complicated. =((((( Annoyance. I now respect opthamologists. (Y)

Math was a relief! ♥ She was absent. The teacher who ALWAYS gets all prissy about absentees has finally become absent herself! I was thinking, if we were badly-brought-up students, we would totally draw our guns when we see her for the next lesson. BUT. We are good students, women of distinction. Haha. Had a chat with our relief teacher.

After school! We had science practical after school. We had about an hour's break in between the end of the school day and the science practical. So we walked to subway and had our lunch. Somehow Jolene and Brenda and turned Regina and my eating of sandwiches into some competition. HAHA. Retarded people. We were a half hour late for our science practical This week's Bio. Have I mentioned that?....

So annoying. We couldn't go until we had completed everything. RAWR.

Left at about 330+ 4? Somewhere there. Went up to the band room for sectionals on the busking pieces. =) Nice to see all the sec 2s. As usual, half the sec 4s turned up and only Rena for the sec3s. HAHA. Patterns in a weekly life.

Practised POKER FACE. (Y) I'm playing bass for that. Fun. Repetitive, but fun. =) Sounds nice. I think that's gonna be the first piece we can all play together. A L P O H is messy cos all of us have different versions of scores. Y'know those you get online, Ver 1 Ver 2. -.- Wellz. It's OK, Crystal and I are sorting that out. We're taking charge for this busking thing. =) At least no resentment is shown. Don't know if there is any, but I'm not saying I think there is. Am I confusing?... heh.

Everyone left one by one. In the end, it was Crystal and I who left last together. I've a story to tell about the way home...

I saw two people I know on the way home. Now I know where Nicole lives. ^^

As I was getting on the bus home, I saw a few CJC people. ONe of 'em, I shockingly realised, was the girl I was rivals with in primary school. AHAH. Ah, the history of my primary school bus life...

So this girl, she's one year my senior. We used to argue all the time in the bus. I still remember how it started. Haha.

My "gang" (all younger, ee I'm such a bitch ahah) and I were a ruckus in the bus. So the girl I saw today, and her two companions used to be really annoyed with us. HAHA. Being in primary school, P3(my friends), P5 (me) and P6(them), we weren't exactly mature. Super childish. Stupid insults HAHAH. And that was the first time I knew about the whole finger letters with "loser, whatever, moron sucker". -.- HAHA.

SO. One of the companions was Indian (I mean she's still Indian but... Aiyerr she existed in my life in the past) and I think her name is Ambika. The other was Sabrina, Chinese. If I remember correctly, the one I saw today is Michelle. BUT I'M STILL NOT SURE. That's what's getting me. =(

I'm 100% sure I saw her today. I know it I know it I know it!

I wonder if any of my seniors know her. Maybe I'll ask... Since they were all in the same year.

NEXT. After a few stops, I saw NICOLE. Oh yes, have I mentioned I saw the CJC girl when I was boarding the bus. Crowded entrance, empty bus. HAHA. Yes, so, I SAW NICOLE ASHLEY ANG. I totally recognize her. It's something about her that makes her different from a lot of people... I saw her say bye to her friend and walk back into the building. I shan't say where she lives, sekali she comes and bludgeons me to death for telling the WWW her address. HAHA.

I know where my stalker lives. Twisted much?

I felt better seeing these two people, for some reason.

Seeing that old friend (yes, we unofficially reconciled when she moved on to Secondary school haha) made me feel a little satisfied. I've recently been wrecking my brains trying to remember her. And today, I came so close to talking to her again. Small talk or whatever. Do you remember me?

BUT. I couldn't cos I was kinda in the bus. Aww.

Seeing Nicole made me feel a little more whole... I can't explain it. Cos today, Brenda and I were talking about things. I felt so empty. Everyone's getting who they want and I'm still not getting any. I don't know if I should wait or move on. Oh wellz! It was that plus a little stuff here and there throughout the day. Seeing Nicole made it a little better somehow? Even though we haven't had a heart-to-heart talk for a long while.

--------

WEEKEND. SELF-AWARENESS CAMP. Have I talked about it yet? Lol. Well, we did masks. About the self that we portray to the world and who we really are. Have you ever asked yourself, who are you? And do you have the answer?

Deep, man. S-A C, deep. Yeah...

Many sessions. Shan't share. HAHA. Personal. =)) Enjoyed myself and learned a lot, that's what's important right? =D Haha I love my facil, Sajid. ♥

Fun guy. Interesting life. Lucky guy, I mean, how many people do you meet in your life who live within the Himalayas? =D

Yeah we saw A DOG. Belongs to one of the guys who work there. So cute right!

MORE ON THE WEEKEND. AHHA. Went out with my dad.

We played POOL. It was a draw. 6:6

He won 6 games and so did I. 12 games. 3 hours. Powder! (inside joke). HAHA. Damn I love my dad!

I'm hanging by a thread|10:31 PM|

Friday, January 22, 2010

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Cos he died for you and me

Nobody tags this thing. =( Not complaining, not complaining. =) Hahha.

So, self-awareness camp today. I swear, sec 5 is WAY FUCKING BETTER than sec 4 S-A C. =D

Shan't elaborate, you bitches find out for yourselves. =))) Hahaha. I don't think anyone I know outside of IJ reads this anyway. (;

Dip dip d-d-d-dip dip d-d-d-dip dip d-d-d-dip.

I'm hanging by a thread|10:34 PM|

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

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Irreplaceable

I've been reading A7x's thoughts on the passing of Jims. Still breaks my heart, every time. =( And I'm sure I'm not the only one. I don't think many of my friends know how I feel, even though they say they do. I don't think they love the Rev the way I do. He was my role model, I've been modeling my drumming after him, I wanted a tattoo just like his. I admired his every idiosyncrasy. I don't know how to explain it. I know I am not feeling anything close to what his family and the band members are, but I do believe I'm feeling something stronger than my friends who love A7x. hahhah, cos everyone falls for M and Zac. Haha. Haha. Hmmm. * laughing fades into a hum*

Sigh. =( Now the memory of the A7x concert is doubly precious. Everyone wishes they'd gone, and so I appreciate that I had the chance to watch 'em Live before this.

"He told all of us for years, including his parents, that he knew two things in life. He wanted to be a rockstar, and that he wasn’t going to live past 30 years old. He was right on both accounts, but I know Jimmy, and if he knew how much pain this would cause for the ones he left behind, he would have done anything he could to stick around a little longer." - M Shadows. See the post, it's so...

Rawr. Anyway, I really don't understand my math teacher when it comes to why she does and says the things she says and does. -.- I understand the math, I don't understand the teacher.

Band+Busking Prac+Dinner = home at 8.30

<-so neat right

Did my Math until.. I don't know what time. Washed up, turned on my laptop. Blah blah.
It's so late. Who knew I'd ever bother to do my work after 6. Hah.

I'm hanging by a thread|11:43 PM|

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

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The story lies in the details

ALRIGHT. I'm pretty chirpy today. =) Wasn't too tired in the morning, first lesson was PoA. It's pretty fine now. =) Lens is a good teacher I guess, either that or it's just me... Finally bucking up and paying attention...? HAHA. I've never done PoA that fast, I swear! I've never had so much ledger paper at one time! Gosh, what a new experience! It's good for me too! (Y)

After PoA was the best. Mother Tongue, went to some floor somewhere with Diane and Regina. They started playing guitar, and I had nothing to do. So! I laid one of the guitar cases nicely on the floor beside me, laid on top of it, and went to sleep. Nice, deep sleep. Somehow, I sleep best IN SCHOOL. Wtf. Hahah. Regina woke me up in a shock. =( Cos she threw her wallet on the case I was lying on, and it made that sound you know the sound it makes... Right next to my head. =( HAHA. I jerked upon awakening... Stupid...

Went back to class, the three of us were totally late for English. HAHA. I saw Jolene at my seat (totally predictable, cos I'm sitting with Brenda so of course Jolene would move whenever she can haha) so I walked straight to hers. Next to Marianne. Gu was trying to give us the papers we hadn't gotten. He handed the paper to both of 'em after he and I had a funky conversation.

Gu: Your paper?

Me: Huh... (just woke up luh)

Gu: Are you taking (English)?

Me: Uh. Noo. (super lifeless)

Gu: Dropping ah? Not taking anymore?

Me: uh no, yah, no. Uh yah not taking. *smiles*

Gu: Oh, OK. =)

HAHA. Funky siol. So I slept through English. That sums up about 4 blocks of sleep. <3>

I was so on about our Geog project cos I was so awake. Heh. I'VE GOT THE GREEN STRAWS (my specialty: straws)! We still aren't sure who's gonna be our coniferous tree! Dang. Lol.

Recess was... Unusual, to say the least. We, sec 5s, should strike fear in the eyes of the younger people, I say! That's how Marianne put it, I was ranting in ultimate layman English about the stupid juniors being so bitchy. We totally own the fucking silverchairs please, don't GLARE like that. Fuckerssssss. TSK. We should work on looking scarier. If it were last year and I were to face last year's sec fives... To be honest I'd be scared and let them do what they want. HAHA. Inferiority complex sey?

Anyway! We got our silverchairs, and once we were settled, WE TOTALLY OWNED IT. =D I love this, hahahha. Everyone's younger, baby! I sound really bitchy now... Oh maaaaaaaah.

After recess, it was 3 freaking hours of NE/CIP shit. =( Boring, much?! Not so, actually. With company like Jolene, Regina, Nurriny, Diane, Brenda... They make things FUN. <3

After skewle! I keep using "after" and "anyway". I should stop...

When school ended...! (ah haaaaaah)

Jolene, Brenda, Sacha, Audrey and I headed down to Plaza Singapura. To watch a movie! I thought we were gonna have lunch-lunch, but we just bought food to bring with us into the cinema in the end. =( I guess it's not bad, cos if you minus off the ticket price, I only had 50 cents. HAHA. Yes, I only $7 today. =( So Jolene bought my food and all first. Aww, so nice right. Now I owe her 6.50... HAHAH. I only ever owe these people money, the Elite group. HAHA. Cos everyone else usually owes me, not the other way around. =(

Movie was really good! And the volleyballers in the movie, whoaaaa. Fucking hot siaaaaaaaa. <3>

So sweeeet. Based on a true story. Wait, I haven't mentioned the title right? HEH. THE BLIND SIDE. Or so I think... If I remember correctly luh.

Right after the movie, we all headed home. It feels like I live the furthest away from town, if you consider MRT-wise. From DG, Jolene, Audrey and Sacha dropped off at Serangoon. Brenda alighted at Farrer. =( I'm left alone for two stops: Kovan and Hougang. HAHA.

Oh wellz.

Got homeeeee. Home sweet home. Drummed for about an hour, somewhere there. Haha. I was trying to blast the music in my ears and play accordingly. Surprising ah... =))) I could follow most of it. YAY. HAHA. Wtf wtf wtf. I'm so preppy now. Omg shut upppppp.

I think I'll go earn myself some cash in Plants VS Zombies. Ciao, baby!

(I'm a drummer for a band now, eh eh eh . ^^)

I miss you.

I'm hanging by a thread|9:55 PM|

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Alright! Done. I feel a little smarter. I bet you all, I'll say I'm stupid tomorrow though.

I'm hanging by a thread|1:17 AM|

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Someone's makin' a fortune

Why am I still awake?
I was going to say something really deep and meaningful, then I got carried away in Farmville. =( My Safari is fucked up, so I'm using Mozilla. =(
Plants VS Zombies isn't good for me right now. =( I'm supposed to be focusing on my work and not playing a game (that I am totally owning by the way).
Speaking of ADDICTIONS. No, it's not what you think. HAHA. I'm addicted to. FUCK I just forgot again. Argh. OH OH. I remember. I have fallen in love with the text font NYALA. Go look it! In MSN perhaps. Haha. I love it love it love it! I'm trying to change this blog's font to Nyala...

Well, a drastic change in mood from just now (see previous post). Now I'm pretty satisfied... Cos. Yeah. I'm not saying anything, until everything is confirmed and I've settled down. =D But I'm totally telling the Elite people tomorrow. <3

Cos it's all over the radio. Cuts me deep with every word, saddest song I've ever heard. Drowning in the melody, makes me feel like I can't breathe.

I'm hanging by a thread|1:07 AM|

Monday, January 18, 2010

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What's your fucking problem? I didn't do anything to you right! If you're still angry about the church thing then SAY SO luh, so childish for what! You're a fucking adult and you wanna behave like this. I'm a teenager, I'm still fucking learning to control my feelings. So fucking BITCHY for what! Being a bit moody is A MOTHERFUCKING CRIME now eh? Fuck you! If I wanna be moody, let me be! I'm not taking it out on you or shouting at you or being rude to you so fuck off. Whatever it is, get over it?!?!?! What's the hell's is your bloody issue! Why can't I be feeling off sometimes?! YOU DON'T FUCKING EXPECT ME TO FUCKING FACE YOU WITH A MOTHERFUCKING SMILE ALL THE FUCKING TIME RIGHT. And if you want me to do just that, then WHAT KIND OF _ ARE YOU. You're supposed to nurture me and shit like that, not expect me to keep my feelings to myself. That is when you have a runaway child. Cos the child can't express his or her feelings in her own FUCKING home. So I don't greet you with my usual smiley 'heyyy' and hug, which coincidentally is a day after a fight. BIG FUCKING DEAL. You responding like that makes it CLEAR that YOU yourself aren't over it yet. You expect me to be over it before you can? WHAT SHIT. Why can't I fucking close the door without you knocking on it every fucking 20 minutes. I JUST WANNA BE ALONE SOMETIMES FOR A WHILE CAN?!?!?!?!? I'M NOT FUCKING MADE OF WOOD. And you wonder why I'm always on the computer. No, I don't fucking chat with people 24/7. I do this, exactly this. Because I can't let my feelings out anywhere or anyhow else. Cos even in my own fucking room, where everything is the way I want it to be because I'm the only one living in it, I can't be alone in my own bubble of thoughts. Cos YOU will come and disrupt, assuming I'm being angry for no apparent reason. YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY POSSIBLE REASON FOR ME TO BE UPSET YOU KNOW. OH MY GOD. I'm so fucking pissed off right now.

I'm hanging by a thread|7:20 PM|

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A parody of you

I'm feeling a little off the ball today. =(

I'm nervous about art, cos I haven't drawn a thing (and somehow can't get myself to start) and I haven't chosen which theme I'd like to do. I'm feeling really tired, and I don't know why. My hair won't do what I want it to. My tongue feels weird today. My toenail nailpolish chipped. I feel extraordinarily fat today. I've been really thirsty all day. My eyes are itching to death. (And then there's the whole in my heart, which makes every day a little more gloomy than it should be).

Ahh. =( Take this away, all of this.

Oh wellz. =( In this world of perfidy at will, we have to stand strong for the ones we love right?

I'm hanging by a thread|6:43 PM|

Sunday, January 17, 2010

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Feel yourself suffocating

HEY OH. Hey hey hey hey oh.

Haha.

Sooo.

Regina, Nurriny and I went to the Escape Theme Park yesterday! Super fu-un!

It was CCA Orientation for the sec ones in the morning, so we had to be in school. Nurriny didn't go though.

Band had to perform so, I had to be there. =) I love performing with the school band, even though section politics is eating me alive inside. Played SING and NOBODY (haha, yes. The Korean song). Played bass for sing, my favorite part is when I play 0 3 0 5 5 3 2 3 2 5 5 3 1 1. HAHA. Nice shit. So fun. Nobody, played Timpani. Haha. It's repetitive and a boring rhythm, but it's important. ;D

After that, we had to stay for the rest of the performances and the talk about LEAPS. At first, Heather and I sat on the bass amp. Cos there's nowhere else to sit. Crystal stood. I think Kia Ying stood too. After a while, my bone was painful. =( I need that chaiirrrrr but Ng keeps forgetting to get it. =( Or should I get it myself... Oooooh imagine that.

Heather and I then moved to the floor between the timpani drums. Cozy, Crystal joined us. HAHA. Kia Ying continued to stand. After a LONG while, the other percs decided to finally be smart like us and sit on the floor. -.-

Got bored, moved to the toilet to talk. Hahaha.

The usual orientation drill began. Get people to join band. HAHA. (Y) I'm glad so many people signed up for band! =D I do, I really do hope that there are a few sec ones who signed up who're rhythmic. And not join Percs only cos they've no hope in any other instrument. >;(

Most of all, I do wish that whoever does join percs, rhythmic or not (lol), have good hearts and one face, not more. And aren't bitchy or backstabbing. And the ultimate: commitment and love for band, baby!

Eh shit, since when did I have a personal list of things I want a junior to be? HAHHAHAH.

AND THEN. hahaa. After we were dismissed, we changed out of our band uniforms. Then we started practising A Little Piece of Heaven. =D I'm on the drums. I think I've said that before. :/ So even if Chan doesn't allow us to busk (which is unlikely), we've learned much more and we've bonded! =D HHahaha.

I remember when we were walking out after the Piece of Heaven practice, Crystal said if we can't busk then it's all wasted. Then I gave a short speech on how we've learned and been enriched by learning something together outside of band songs and we can play it together some time as a tribute to THE REV.

Wow, this is so wordy. I think I'll double space the lines...

Does this look better? HAHAHA. I'm lazy. Forget it. Heh.

After our busk practice, we walked to Macs at TP interchange to have lunch. This was Kia Ying, Crystal, Heather and me. =) Only Heather and I ate. =( Crystal and Kia Ying shared a large fries. =(

After lunch, the three of 'em went to NTUC to do AUNTY shopping.. HAHAHAHHAHAHA. Damn funny. I split, and went to the MRT area to wait for Nurriny.

Met Nurriny and we walked down to the platform to wait for Regina. We then made our way to Pasir Ris.

I go crazy when I'm with those two, I swear! It's only with them that I'll move around and sing things (not necessarily the lyrics) when I listen to A7X. HAHA. I bet they think I'm insane too. =)

Got to Pasir Ris and waited for the Shuttle bus. SO SUNNY. Omg. We had to like stand in the shadow of an advert board thing. Y'know those you see beside bus stops? Yeah, that.

We had to redeem the free tickets we had. Stupid Diane backed out last minute cos she was tired (it's okayy I still love her hahahhaha). =( So one ticket was forfeited. No real loss, so whatever. HAHA. Would've been better with Diane though, cos y'know... Most rides are TWO BY TWO. So for many rides, one of us sat alone. Hehheh.

Super fun! We started with the Haunted house/house of horrors (I can't remember the name). Whoa. We were so unnecessarily scared! HAHAH. Inside, we were screaming for NO reason and clinging on to each other for dear life. =D LOL.

When we got out, Regina said, "that wasn't scary at all". HAHAHAHAHA.

We went on the VIKING the most. (Y)<3>

We only rode a few 'rides' actually. Go-karts (first time ever), viking (three times), ferris wheel (damn spaz), the rocket thingy (Nurriny sat out cos it was two by two, so annoying. Who'd wanna lie there alone), horrorrrrrrr, roller coaster. THAT'S ABOUT IT. HAHA. Lousy right. Our amusement park sucks. Can't wait for Sentosa's Universal Studios to open. Gawsh.

Despite the minimal rides, we had so much fun. HAHA. Or at least I did. =D =D I love these retarded dudes. <3<3<3

Dinner wasn't dinner at all! It was drinks and chips at Subway. (Y) Nurriny and I had drinks and Regina bought chips. So nice, she bought the chips she wanted AND Ruffles that I wanted and shared it with us. Aww, right? <3 class="Apple-style-span" color="#CCCCCC">Bus, MRT and Taxi. HAHA. Regina took a bus (I assume, she was on her way to taking one), Nurriny took the MRT and lo and behold, guess who took a taxi. -.- Motherrrr wanted me to. =( I need to save money man!

Got home too late to practise the drumssszsxzsx. =(( I'm nervous about tomorrow. And I'm not saying why on this blog. At least, not until something happens. =D

HAHAHA.

Long post. As usual. -.- I'm out! =D

Bye Y'ALL. See you in another lifetime. [Probably in a few days' time or something].

I'm hanging by a thread|11:02 PM|

Friday, January 15, 2010

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The more I see, the less I know.

The more I'd like to let it go.

But I need more than myself this time.

Step from the road to the sea to the sky.

I'm hanging by a thread|11:33 PM|

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Aiyooooooooo. I just realised, my uber long post about Green day and all. So colorless. =( I'mma add more colors... Very unnecessary but whatever. HAHA.

I'm hanging by a thread|6:25 PM|

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You had my heart, at least for the most part.

Hello, world. =) Haha. Super-teens ended on Wednesday. Parents came for the "closing ceremony". Haha. We were supposed to go and hug 'em and say we love 'em and stuff. What we were learning in from the super-teens workshop was basically learning/memory techniques, self-esteem/acceptance, and appreciating our parents. Especially our mothers. Cos they carried us for nine months and went through the pain of labor that no man will ever know. Cos only females go through it, duh. HAHAHAH. And the number of hugs someone should have in a day to survive nicely is SEVEN to EIGHT. =) Must hug everybody from now on! HAHA.

Yesterday, we resumed school. How annoying! Having gone home late every night, you'd have expected that the school would give us a day off. The reason they didn't: We're supposed to be motivated to come to school to learn. -.-

Tiring much! So, compliance, went to school yesterday. SO FUCKING SLEEPY. Cos the closing ceremony ended at about 10.30PM? I got home at about 11+ I guess. And I had to harvest and serve (FB Zynga applications, heh) so I slept at roughly around 1am.

I couldn't wake up! I was dragged onto the floor from my bed, so I'd get off my back and wash-up to get ready for school. What a chore. Rawr. ); (hahahaaha. If you see my MSN name, you'll get it). I slept in class before morning assembly, was half asleep during morning assembly and HHF-period-talk, and slept for the rest of that period. Nice, deep sleep I was in cos when I woke up for SS, I felt so much better. Energized! (Imagine bunny...)

Terrorism is an interesting topic, I say! I made up an entire cartoon in my head...

After SS was... Math. =( Fuck you sia, priorities all. It's a ONE-OFF thing, big deal.

ANYWAY... Sigh, piss myself off. Shucks. *Breathes in, breathes out*

PoA was fun, though. I felt like I'd learned something! I mean, we all know how bad my PoA is. And for a change, Brenda didn't know something that I knew! And she got 9 points for N's. Very nice. Hehheh. Then again, she wasn't around for the last lesson. Oh wellz.

Recess and the rest of the day was the best! Recess; Diane, Regina and I could take our own sweet time to eat and wait for queues to shorten to get our food (excluding Diane cos she ate just a spotty banana). Nurriny had to go for class, though. Since the rest of us took our time, she was late. HEH.

Regina and I did our Math after recess. Cos it was 3 periods of Mother Tongue, which the three of us (Diane, Regina and myself) dropped cos we passed our O's Syllabus B papers.

Diane was just trying out our sums for fun!? HAHA.

She went off at about 12.30. She loves leaving school early. She never has anything to do. =( Talk about efficient, man.

Regina and I were wrecking our brains doing our Math. Our teacher gave us questions she had never taught us. Wtf?

I left the two questions out. I'm not sure if Regina did the same. Cos I finished up and put it in our teacher's pigeon hole, whereas Regina wanted to take her time. (Y)

I wanted to get home earlier so I'd be able to relax for a while then take my time to get ready for GREEN DAY. So... After school, Nurriny joined us. We've got this tiny field on the first floor, with pebble benches&tables (y'know those types with the advertising umbrellas) which we inhibit during most Mother Tongue lessons.

Sooooo. We were there until about an hour after school ended. I took a cab home. Passed Whitley. Or at least, where Whitley used to be. GRR. Saw all the St Nicks girls. Invasion much. Like ants, spread out from the school area to Braddell. Yuck. I was disgusted watching them. =(

Got homeeeee. Ate some food (my lunch larh) and computed! Farmville, cafe world, fishville, country life. It's an addiction, damn it! =((( Very bad, very bad.

Then I started to get ready. Bathed a nice, long bath. -.-

Since my fringe had been pinned up the last few days (school), I made an effort to look extra nice. I don't know why, so the pinned up fringe was my best bet for an excuse to put on make up. Hahaha. Cos usually I'm way too lazy.

Face powderrrr ( I don't like to call it foundation), eyeliner, and lipstick. Once in a blue moon do I use lipstick SIOL. Best part; can't really see my eyes cos my fringe is really long. =D I deliberately wore RED lipstick (notice the caps to accentuate how red I wanted it) to match the black eyeliner. It ain't really black, actually. It's a purplish-black. Anna sui ftw.

Somehow all that put together made my face whiter. Cool shit. Either that, or it was the lighting in the photos. HAHA.

Uncle came over to fetch me. Drove to AMK to pick Jake up. Yup, the three of us were going to Green Day's concert. My Uncle loves Green Day. They've been around since his time. Which isn't very long ago cos he's only like, 31. Who gets to go to a concert of a band they love on their 31st birthday? My uncle. =D

Jake looked uber different. I swear. So, so different. Interesting aye? Haha.

When we arrived at the Singapore Indoor Stadium, the opening act was still on so we weren't exactly late. We were seated a few rows behind where Jayni, Elizah and I sat 3 years ago for Linkin Park. =))

Green Day was fucking awesome.

They really know how to interact with the audience.

And y'know, live concerts are always only about an hour long. Green Day was like... 4 hours long. Almost there. (Y) Good stuff. Shirt guns and beer sprays baby! So now we know, when Green Day comes, be in the mosh pit and stand out. I'm not gonna narrate the concert cos... Then what's the point of paying to see it. -.- So I ain't putting the videos on FB either. =)) I'm just gonna put one. I thoroughly enjoyed that show! <3

So this morning... I was super tired. And I've got a soar throat. Didn't go to school... I don't think I missed much cos there was no homework or anything. =)

I think this post is very long... Why do I type so much when I blog?!?!?! I think I talk a lot too, maybe that's why. =( I need to learn to shut up.

Learning A Little Piece of Heaven on the drums now (tribute to Jims Sulls cos he wrote this song). Suckish. It's so difficult. =( Man, I love The Rev. R.I.P Jimmy, rock out in Heaven. <3>

I wonder how they're gonna find a new drummer who brings that much to the table. Halfway recording their fifth album, too. I keep saying this, and I'll say it again. Half of the album would be deJimmied if they release it all finished. =(

Oh wellzzzz. "Everybody's gotta die sometime" - A Little Piece of Heaven.

I'm hanging by a thread|4:00 PM|

Monday, January 11, 2010

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They fly so high, they reach the sky.

HELLO, HELLO. I'M A FUCKING HAPPY CHILD RIGHT NOW.

So, I shall start to enthusiastically narrate my day!

Today (and tomorrow and the next day) is our (sec5) Super-teen programme! 3 Days of motivational speaking and stuff. =) To help us with studying strategies and self-esteem. We learned A LOT.

FOR THE WORLD TO KNOW, 'TRY' IS A VERY VERY BAD WORD. Especially good for leaders to know that. ;D

Must say "do your best" and not "try your best". Keywords, baby. I learned about that quite some time ago, but never seen it in action. Today was the day I finally did.

I can memorise this list of 30 words in sequence and backwards too. And another list of 10 other words in sequence and backwards. Everyone else who was participating can too. Awesome strategies!

Wallpaper, mountain, skirt, string, ice-cream, scissors, nails, watch, nurse, perfume, elephant, jail, mirror, suitcase, plant, power(hahaha PLANT POWER), safe, watermelon, Michael Jackson, climb, bun, shoes, tree, door, hive, stick, heaven, gate, wine, hen!

The power of imagination, baby!

Then there's the other list. Durian, basketball, elephant, milk, sausage, colored markers, grass, chain, monkey (my favorite haha), cup.

I love this workshop. Love it ttm. It's so helpful! Spider-grams ftw!

So, morning assembly. Performed with the band. Snare for Majulah. I don't think I've ever been to school so early. :/

Collected 'O' level Art question paper. So hard! =( Ass. I love art but damn, I hate the subject!

Went to the hall toilet to call Diane to find out where they went. AVA!

Funny stuff, the speakers. They're so hilarious, the faces and actions, the things they say!

Enjoyed myself thoroughly today!

LUNCH TIME, THE BEST TIME TODAY. <3

Went to get the 'O' LEVEL RESULTS. Most of us had to go (Express Cina was the majority, then the syllabus B mother tongues, then the express English) so they let everyone off. For me, it was Express English and Chinese Syllabus B. They talked and talked. Diane, Regina and I were like, 'wtf hurry up we want our results!'

Regina did Tamil B and Diane did Express English and Chinese B, like me.

THEN, they moved on to the achievements of our school! Our school's achievements are so awesome luh.

THE POWER OF THE BAND OMFG. HAHA. Xin Hui (band major) was the top scorer for Mother Tongue or was it overall? Same diff. Top scorer! HAHAH. And Monica, expectedly, got SIX points.

Should've seen the look on Chan's face. Classic. I love Chan siol, he's so passionate about band and so proud of his students. =) He doesn't know my marks, but I hope he'd be proud too if he knew.

So we Normal Academic girls got our 'O' level subject results too.

Form teachers gave out the slips. Except 5/3, J Chu gave theirs out.

So Ng was giving out to us, 5/1 students. By register number. Haha typical kan chiong spider Singaporeans. Big crowd around Ng. All waiting for their results. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. I walked to the side for a clearer view of Ng. And looked around at other people.

Shimmen was around, idk why though. So random. Haha. Then I heard "Audrey! Audrey!", Ng called out. So I knew my turn was soon. "Jean," and then "Shannen," Ng called. My hand was stretched out, just about to collect the slip. And the classic, move away just before I got it. She retracted the paper, and looked at me with a smile. "I must say, Shannen. Well done."

Nice. I was really surprised. Like, whoa what did I get, man?

I took my slip. Looked at it. And couldn't say anything.

I GOT A FUCKING A2 FOR ENGLISH.

AND I PASSED MY CHINESE SYLLABUS B.

It's really amazing. I swear. I thought I'd die of shock?

THIS IS OFFICIALLY THE SECOND TIME IN MY ENTIRE 16 YEARS OF LIFE I'VE PASSED CHINESE. Yes, I failed in Kindergarten. Passed one exam in Primary one. And passed one CLB (still chinese right) exam (O's). HAHAH.

So I was thinking... God loves me. Yay.

I wanna get through life (most times) at least to the age of 21. And many times I doubt I can make it. I always think I'd fail and a million and one set backs will come my way.

But no. God's proving me wrong and he's helping me through these times. Maybe the worst was the worst but it's getting better. And maybe the worst hasn't even come, but when it does I guess we'll see what happens then.

But recently, God's been there when I doubted myself.

I was 100% ready to fail my N's, and I walked up to Ng to collect my results slip completely calm and ready for her to say I failed. All prepped and ready for a lecture of the century! I passed.

'O' levels, I was expecting a C5 or 6. Cos ever since Express English started (sec 3, after sec 2 streaming of course), I'd been getting C's. What difference could it be now, I thought. I'd been failing Chinese since PRIMARY 2, and haven't passed CLB before. Just let me see that fail and C, baby! I got an A2 and a Pass.

Yeah...

So. I love God. Praise the Lord, man. The story about the footprints in the sand, I can apply that. I could be like some retarded part-time motivational speaker... Nah. HAHA. I've got like, how many testimonies. -.- The accident, the N's, the English O's.

Monica was so funny. "The a2 is a testament to your linguistic flair."

(Y) Love Monica man. Love her. HAHA.

So yeah. Everyone was asking everyone. "HOW'D YOU DO, WHAT'D YOU GET".

I don't know EVERYBODY'S results. But I know the most part?

So from what I know:

- Everybody passed their Syllabus B's.

- I'm the only Express English one to get an A. (But I'm very sure someone else got an A as well, there's no way I could ever top this lol)

- Express Chinese girls mostly got B's and C's.

- Express English girls mostly got B's. B3's.

- _ did worse than me for English. That unoriginal bitch, who changes her looks when I change mine. And always ends up looking just like me. Copy sey. I know, "imitation is the sincerest form of flattery". Damns man, I'm not flattered, I'm annoyed! HAHA.

I feel like a bitch now. I shall get off this topic on the 'O' level results.

After we got our happy results, we all returned to the AVA room for more learning! It's super fun. I'm glad I'm learning.

I don't think I've been this excited to revise before. Like ever in my life. All ready to create my spider-grams for every topic!

HAHAHAHHA.

Lasted all the way till 8PM.

We ended with a movie. No luh, a clip from a movie. 20 minutes long. With who as a boxer? Sylvester Stallone. HAHAHA. Rocky! Funny shit. So what we learned from that was, to never give up. HAHA.

Can't wait for tomorrow's and the next day's! Awesome shit! I'm a happy adolescent.

And by the way, Nurriny got full marks for her 'O' level paper. She did 'O' level "KPOH". Quoted from her, k.

HAHAH. Gosh I love these people. They make my life sunnier. <3

Anzywayz. Had a good day today. And I'm gonna try my best to restrict this blog from my inner turmoil. I have my reasons. Hahahahaa.

My posts are so wordy. I need to add peektures. But what. =(

I'm hanging by a thread|9:02 PM|

______________________________

"Good things come to those who wait".

I'm waiting.

I'm hanging by a thread|12:09 AM|

Sunday, January 10, 2010

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Wander the streets of emotion

I think I'll revive this blog. =)

Let's start from the beginning. New shit with a new year.

Got a new skin! I've learned more about HTML doing this one. I found a site with HTML codes for colors, all of 'em. Awesome shit. BUT. I'm still confused. =( I want this to show titles but nooo. And when I try to put the title header thing in, the date disappears. My experiments resulted in this post having no date. Damns. Anyone wanna help me edit the HTML to work out? =))

So hello, hello. Allow me to introduce myself. My name is, Shannen. It's nice to meet you.

I'm hanging by a thread|6:50 PM|